Before I had kids, I used to look at other people’s offspring and think to myself “Why is that kid so annoying? Why don’t they do something to fix it (and by “it,” of course, I was referring to the child in question).
And then I had my first kid, and knew she wasn’t going to be one of the annoying models, because I would nip that shit in the bud and mold her into a well-behaved non-irritating version.
And to be honest, it kind of worked (well, I thought it did. Now I realize kids are who they are and parental guidance is probably not the ultimate determinate of a kid’s behavior. It turns out THEY HAVE PERSONALITIES! (who woulda thunk it?)). At any rate, my oldest kid has always been a level-headed, engaged, poised child. She sits in restaurants, chatting with adults. She generally obeys the first time you ask her to do something. She’s independent, self-motivated, focused , and driven. She does well in school. She remembers to brush her teeth and floss, and write in her journal and write thank-you notes, and she does her homework without being asked, and knows how to keep calm when necessary, hanging out with adults with a grace and confidence we all find immensely appealing. She is the quintessentially not-annoying child. Damn, she makes me look good. She blows my mind on a daily basis.
Ah, but then I had Rocket.
And let’s be honest: Rocket is, on a regular basis, really freaking annoying.
Why lie? He is.
He’s loud, intense, and constantly moving. He’s like a tornado that makes noise. Most of the time, if Rocket is awake, he’s knocking things down and pissing his sisters off. He’s tying things together and rigging up traps and filling the sink with water and forgetting about it. He’s making the most irritating heart-stopping nails-on-chalkboard screeches you’ve ever heard in your life. He’s making sounds no human has ever made before, and should never make again.
He’s banging toys and breaking things.
He’s not brushing his teeth.
He’s ignoring your orders.
He’s drawing on the door of the car rather than opening it.
He’s forgetting his backpack in the backseat, and his lunch on the counter, again.
His shoes are in the bathroom but he can’t find them because by the time he gets down the hall he forgets what he was looking for.
He’s poking and prodding and flailing and flinging himself off the couch. He’s “hi-ya”-ing the folded laundry pile with a stick he brought in from the backyard.
He’s up in your business. He’s right against your body. He doesn’t know when to quit.
He’s playing too hard, a little too long (and you find yourself saying “Rocket, please stop!” ALL.DAY.LONG.)
It’s a strange moment when you realize you have a kid that irritates people. It’s a piercing reality when you see the look in people’s eyes, saying “This boy, he’s too much.” And you see that The Excessively Uptight pretty much can’t stand being in the presence of your son. Sometimes, they’re mean to him, and you want to break their faces with blunt objects, and grab your boy and fold him up back into your belly, where the assholes don’t exist and he’s safe.
But you know what’s the most amazing feeling in the world? When you realize you don’t give a shit what they think, and you’re set free from the insane notion that your kids should all fit perfectly all the time into society’s idea of a “well-behaved” child.
I have a boy who doesn’t fit. He doesn’t fit in school. (He “makes up Kung-Fu movies in his head” during class.) He’s seven years old and not reading yet. He gets “below basic” marks in every area on his report card.
And you know what? I don’t care. And I’ll tell you why:
The other day he was playing with 9 cubes and he all the sudden said “If I had four groups of these cubes I’d have 36.” And I asked him “Dude, Rocket, how’d you know that?” and he said “I don’t know. I saw it in my head.”
And he’s fascinated with planets and cranes and mechanical devices (he’ll stare at a gadget forever, until he can explain how it works). He builds complex Lego systems and memorizes how to get to places in other cities even though we’ve only been there once.
(He told me when he was five he was “born with maps in his brain.”)
He’ll listen to Jimi Hendrix for hours and after hearing Miles Davis he said “This music seems simple, but it’s actually really complicated. Will you get me some more jazz music?”
His heart’s so big it’s like a constantly exploding star. When he gets upset he looks at me and says “Mama, I LOVE YOU,” as if that’s what’s going to fix it, that’s where his strength comes from, from loving others, and hearing that they love him back.
And I do.
I love him so much my heart breaks sometimes just looking at him, my little son, because I can’t believe I could cherish anything as much as I do that little boy.
And his teachers say he’s doing just fine, when I get worked up and want some answers, about why he isn’t reading yet, and why he just won’t quite fit. They say he’s a natural leader and a joy in class and they love him as much as I do, well, almost.
If I were honest, I’d say “why isn’t he meeting my expectations? Why isn’t he fulfilling MY VISION?”
Because he’s somebody else, doing something else, that maybe I don’t understand.
And yeah, sometimes it’s fucking annoying.
But the rest of the time, I listen for his music, and hear the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard, and I feel more alive myself, watching this kid dance moves I’ve never seen before, feeling my feet start moving right alongside him, knowing if I practice long enough, we’ll be dancing together.
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jen
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 0:29this is a beautiful post…makes me cherish the differences in my beasts…they dont fit a mould and thank christ for that…lovely words..thankyou.
renegademama
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 22:52thank you, Jen.
Sarah Fowlie
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 1:02tears in my eyes. I’ve got one of those. Kooky, brilliant little wally that he is. And he’s my only (and like to stay that way) so he’s got a whole heap of my expectations laying on his shoulders. And it’s nice. To leave that at the door and just let him be. And love him. And let him love me back (without being gruff, apologetic, grumpy). Thank you for a lovely post.
renegademama
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 22:53“brilliant little wally…”
so good. thank you.
Aschala
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 1:36If I didn’t know better, I would think you were writing about my kid. Wonderful post! If you’re ever in Sac & want a “playdate” with another loud, annoying, super awesome kid, please send me an email.
Elizabeth
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 4:21you have a visual spatial kid like me!!! love them….great resource “Upside Down Brilliance” I gave a copy to each of my sons teachers too
Marina
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 4:38Thanks for this, because I suspect I have one of those kids too – our first, a boy, and just … ‘hurricane’ is the word most people use. A loving, empathetic, music-adoring, number-fixated two year old who CANNOT stop moving. I didn’t realise how extreme it all way till I watched a friend read to her daughter and realised she were curled up on her lap instead of jumping from foot to foot. Or dancing. That’s our quiet time: I read to him, while he hops in place…
Needless to say, I adore him. Not what I expected (I’m sedentry and bookish) but it’s so much fun! I can’t wait to see what he’ll become. And I can’t wait to meet his little brother, due any day now. We might just be a family of robust furniture and lots of outdoor time, which might not be quite what I’d pictured (me and my daughters, discussing Virginia Woolf together … That’s what I pictured, more fool me) but there’s something about being the trusted repository for THAT MUCH love and energy and passion and enjoyment of life which makes me catch my breath and delight in my child.
Rtaylo
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 4:56After having a mtg at school yesterday and being a mom to a porcupine (prickly on the outside and soft on the inside) boy this is exactly what I need to read today. Thank you
Claire
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 5:04Holy cow I was just thinking the same thing about my two the other day. Child 1 is just like you oldest. Child 2 is just like Rocket. On extremely bad days, I think to myself, if Child 2 had come first, I would have never had another kid. But then I remember how amazing each one is in their own way.
Ashley
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 5:40Love this post! It couldn’t of came at a better time for me! P.S Your site is GREAT!
Marisa
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 6:52I have one child. She is like your oldest. I have friends who have children like Rocket. Some are impressed with my daughter, but I just remind them, it’s her personality. She’s easy, I tell her what she needs to do and she does it.
I love children like Rocket. When I was teaching, to be honest, those children were my favorite.
MamaHawk
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 7:02Rocket and Jeremy are two peas from the same beautiful pod. *swoon* I was just thinking yesterday about the great pic of the two of them when Rocket was about 4 months old and was giving Jeremy a knowing eye. Pure hearts and energy, those two. I just think, all those other Excessively Uptight mothers will never have the joy of hearing a perfectly sophisticated and spontaneous mash up of gangnam style and Twelve Days of Christmas.
Love you!
Kathy G
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 7:03Other than when he was three years old and disruptive in the local library pissing off the old farts, my son was not a “rocket”, he was quite a bit quieter but always in a different world. At first his teachers said he was passive ADD. I refused to medicate. My son had no problem concentrating, he just preferred to concentrate on other things. He is a thinker and a dreamer. He is a writer and a comic. He is an artist and an arguer. He is not a people pleaser. He is a picky eater. He listend to every kind of music he could get his hands on. He made up big whoppers about how he wrote code for games, wrote music and produced movies on YouTube, traveled over Europe when he was in middle school. His counselors briefly suggested he was mentally unbalanced and might be a shooter a la Viginia Tech d/t his obsession with Green Day lyrics. (he is not). He still finds inappropriate things immensely hilarious. He did not give a shit about homework through his entire school career until he got to community college where he is now a scholar. Go figure. He still will hardly get up before noon unless he has a class or has to go to work. He will still stay up all night playing video games. His room is still a contender for hoarders. He hasn’t fallen in love yet. He does love his Mom, Dad, and his dog. He also loves logic and philosophy (which he discovered in 9th grade). He is 20 and does not want a car. He has voluntarily gone up before a crowd of people and performed a stand up routine he wrote twice and according to him, bombed each time. He hates team sports. He can strike up conversation with anyone and likes to meet and get to know unusual people but has no use for assholes. At various times in high school he has wanted to be a minister, a bartender, a stand-up comedian, a psychologist, a surgeon, a lawyer, Ralph Nader or Cesar Chavez. Now he wants to write comedic screenplays and novels. He can live here forever if he wants. He is a constant unfolding joy and a sometimes pain in the neck.
TeriTyner
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 9:56Oh Kathy G….you give me hope! It was almost like you were describing my own spawn (who is now 14). Brilliant, but totally uninterested in applying this brilliance to anything academic. He is passing, barely. His room looks like an animal lives there…loves it when its clean (read: when I clean it)but cannot/will not maintain the level of order and cleanliness I would like to see. If I have learned anything from my son, its “relax…let it go..it will be fine”. He has forced me to have faith. Not sure if this is a good thing or not, but I’m going with it!!
renegademama
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 22:55I absolutely loved your comment, Kathy. It gives me hope and energy and inspiration. thank you thank you!
Renee'
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 7:28Beautiful post – I totally get it. My oldest grandson is a “Rocket” and I couldn’t love him more. He beats to a different drum, his own drum. His actions frustrate you one moment and the next, he is hugging you telling you that you are the best grandma on the face of the earth. I love kids like him; he is the kind of kid that keep life interesting. These children are amazing and we, as adults, have to keep that in perspective! Thanks for the post!
renegademama
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 10:07This is identical to my boy (as you said). One second he’s driving me nuts the next second he’s kissing his baby sister’s head saying “I can’t take her cuteness!”
Penny
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 7:31Oh boy do I have one! In fact, I think Dylan was even more annoying than Rocket at Rocket’s age. Always in trouble with every other mother giving me the evil eye. I actually sold my home and moved to another town to insulate him.
He does get a little less annoying with each year of growth, or maybe I become more tolerant of it? All I know is that the kid makes be laugh until my stomach hurts! He is not a clone or cut out of the disney channel and I love him for blazing his own trail, even if the trail is on fire behind him.
I only have three years left before he is hatched. Wish I had twenty more.
Rocket is a GREAT kid. I’m jealous you have 10 more years with him. Enjoy it!
renegademama
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 10:05Dylan is one of my favorite teenagers. The first time Mac met him he said “I really like that kid.” I hope Rocket grows up to be just like him. I genuinely enjoy the company of your son, and that’s pretty weird considering he’s 15!
you’ve helped me a lot Penny. Thank you.
Shan
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 7:40Love this. And him. And you.
Wraste
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 7:45I was a Beastly Child. My mother dealt with it by removing me from the situation.
I’m happy that you’ve come to terms with the personality of your child. I’m happy that you love him, as is good. But I have no understanding of why you would subject other people to him and not teach him what is and is not acceptable in public.
It may be a hard lesson to learn, but it CAN be learned. I learned it and I was the same as Rocket.
You wanna let him be a wild thing at home? Excellent. Teach him that being free and wild at home is “the thing to do.” But then instill the need for restraint in public.
It’s part of the social contract that I feel many parents have lost sight of.
renegademama
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 9:52I knew there’d be somebody who interpreted my words as “I let my kid do whatever the hell he wants like a wild hellion.” Yeah, I don’t. That’s my whole point. I’m constantly struggling to teach him the “social contract” most of us find so easy to adapt to. But rather than punish and demean him, I work to recognize that he is different indeed, but enjoys his own form of creativity and brilliance that shouldn’t be destroyed merely because people (ahem, like you) may get annoyed.
“Subject people to him?!” Nice.
I have a question for you: why would you subject people to your baseless accusations and unfounded assumptions?
Don’t you know that violates the “social contract” between well-behaved adults?
Penny
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 13:24And…comments like that is why I sold my house and moved to a more kid friendly community.
Normal childhood behavior is not a disease, it is not bad parenting, it is simply age appropriate trial and error learning on the part of the child. They do not need to be “subjected” to negative opinions from adults who make them feel as if they are “bad” kids and are of less value because they have not internalized some unspoken social rule. They simply need to test the rule, to see how it applies, and adjust according tho their learning style and personality. Nothing more!
Although my child has made all the social mistakes possible, he is also the 14 year old boy who drop everything to help you when you need it the most, asking for nothing in return. He will sit with the toddler on his lap and play with her for hours because he enjoys her spirit.
So what if he dances and screams when you deem it in inappropriate. He has a beautiful soul and adults can learn a lot by his example.
Penny
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 13:52And may I add, we as moms, do not “let them” do anything. They do it all on their own because they are often strong willed. If I beat him, you would label me a child abuser, but if I accept him and all his struggles, I am “letting him” be a wild thing and subjecting him to others.
Very offensive!
renegademama
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 22:56GO PENNY!!!!! Get ‘im! (or her, but whatever)
nasta
Friday, 5 April, 2013 at 11:06well i have one of those too
sooo happy i found this blog and sooo happy I am not alone with a child with “personality”
Mom of 5
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 18:28let me guess wraste….you have no kids!? Only someone with no kids could make such an ignorant statement! well, actually that’s not true either….plenty of people with kids make such ignorant statements, that’s usually because they are…Ignorant!!
renegademama
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 22:57Over here at Renegade Mothering, we don’t take any shit from anybody — AND I LOVE IT.
Seriously, you women are my heroes, movin’ in and schoolin’ old what’s his face (her face?).
It’s just so good.
Cath
Saturday, 15 December, 2012 at 10:04I have 2 ‘Rockets’. Sometimes you can’t leave. Sometimes grocery shopping just has to get done. I have left stores nearly in tears because of judgemental looks from people who obviously share that attitude. Sure, my reaction is my problem etc etc. Still, think about YOUR actions.
shauna
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 7:47girl, he is a brilliant boy. our schools generally don’t do enough to coonect with kids so bright. you already know all of this. i’m honored to be apart of your world, where i get to peek in on how he will grow and change this world. thanks!
Katie Vyktoriah
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 8:14My little guy is just starting to develop his personality, just in time for the birth of his little brother in a few weeks. I keep thinking I won’t be able to cope, as he’s SO overly rambunctious and… well… he’s a BOY. He’s the most affectionate wonderful amazing little guy I’ve ever known, but he is also a terrifying handful. If I end up with two like this, I think I may go insane!
But this post reminds me how very much in love with him I am. And even though he refuses to settle down for even one minute of his hyperactive day, I wouldn’t change a thing about him.
You have such a way with words. x
missy
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 8:25my middle kid just started reading now that he is 9 1/2, now that his brain is good and ready and not quite so busy building engineer neurons. yes, that would be almost 5 years (half of his life!) of people asking him to read, expecting him to read. and him not reading. your Rocket’s a lucky guy to have teachers and parents who appreciate him.
Lisa
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 8:26I have 2 boys, and both can be incredibly annoying. They are always doing too much, never understanding when enough is enough. They annoy people everywhere I go, and I had them thinking I was going to mold them into the “non-annoying” kids I expected everyone to have before I was a parent. Oh how I see the error of my ways! When I found out my older boy had Asperger’s, it started to make sense. It is being a crazy little boy like they all are, but on steroids. At times I see my friends little girls and wish I had it so easy…but they are such smart and loving little guys, and who really cares what everyone else thinks!!
WorkingMommaWithABaby
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 12:50Before my son was born, I ready EVERY available baby book that discussed how to shape your kids into perfect little adults. I thought I would be a hot shot mom with the most well-behaved kid ever. You know what? I forgot to account for his personality. He is almost two years old and I can tell that he isn’t going to fit the social mold. And honestly, it just makes me sad that we have a standard “mold.” My kiddo isn’t going to be told to “be acceptable” to others. He is loving, smart, and funny. That’s acceptable to the people that matter.
Jenny
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 12:52Thank you so much for actually putting into words the thoughts that are in my head! It is so comforting to know that I am not alone! I don’t have any kids of my own but I look after 8 little ones 5 days a week which is so amazing to be able to do but sometimes I feel like I am stuck on an island with no one who gets what I’m going through on a daily basis…. you do!
Thank you so much for writing!
Jenny
renegademama
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 13:01Eight little ones FIVE DAYS A WEEK? My goodness lady, you probably know more about kids than I do. And kudos to you for trying to understand them. But seriously, EIGHT? That must seriously increase the annoying factor.
Christina
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 14:21Oh Rocket, If you were my student I would always look out for you! I have a major soft spot for the kids that “annoy” other adults.
And Janelle, my daughter is that girl too. I worry, all the time, that she will be labeled or hurt by those that cannot see the amazingly charismatic, vibrant, shinning little human that she is through all the annoying little pestering she does.
Like for instance booby trapping the front entry last night (lots of tying things up was involved)to protect us from harm while we slept and in the process loosing my car keys which I could not find this morning and was 10 minutes late to work!
~sigh~ best of intentions! Gotta love her!
Mom of 5
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 19:06Yes, I do have a child just like that!…actually I have 2!, but seriously I have 3 like that!! 2 of my kids were considered the “easy” ones. After 5 kids the one thing I have learned is that…I know NOTHING! They all have such different personalities, and as they get older, they change as well. My “easy” daughter became not so easy when she hit 7th grade, and my “hard” daughter completely mellowed out when she hit 4th grade. Not only do kids go through stages in life, just like we do, but as they get older they learn how to cope and manage in better ways just as we do. Your boy sounds absolutely PERFECT to me.
renegademama
Wednesday, 12 December, 2012 at 22:54I learn so much from you, Mom of 5. Please keep coming back and writing things. Please!?
Mom of 5
Thursday, 13 December, 2012 at 18:39Thank you Janelle! I learn so much from you as well!.. and as long as you keep writing, so will I!! <3
Emma Woo
Thursday, 13 December, 2012 at 5:24I just discovered your blog and wanted to thank you for helping me through a shitty day. I was up all night vomiting and am now looking after my three mental children on my own. I have just sat here and laughed until I cried and now I feel I have the strength to go on.
Chazzzman
Thursday, 13 December, 2012 at 10:39I loved this so much. You are very lucky.
Kimmi
Friday, 14 December, 2012 at 15:13AMEN! I love reading your blog posts… well said, really enlightening and so honest and true. Keep it up!!
Heidi
Saturday, 15 December, 2012 at 9:14Society has never had a place for the brilliant non-conformists. But all you mamas be unashamed and raise those boys up good because they will be the ones who alter history and save the next generations… then who will be laughing??
mikki
Monday, 17 December, 2012 at 15:33Rocket sounds like my girl. I want to keep her her but teaching her how to be herself and to fit in just isn’t working. So I just love her sensitive brave little heart and wipe her tears and listen to her loud loud laugh.
One thing though, bring Rocket to a GOOD developmental optometrist, just to make sure there are no visual perceptual issues interfering with reading! If you want I can get names for you in your area if you email me where your area is. I know somewhere in CA but if you give a city i’ll give a name.
Helena Villarta
Friday, 11 January, 2013 at 3:12Your blog, which I was introduced to today, has made me cry, smile,scream, laugh (resulting in me peeing in my knickers, courtesy of the prolapsed bladder my youngest gave me as a thank you gift for bringing her into this crazy world)all in the space of half an hour- to my husband’s amusement, I shoul add. More importantly, it made me go upstairs to my still-awake children (at 10 pm, they must’ve read your post on sleep training while I wasn’t watching them!) and get into their beds, cuddle up with them for a while and embrace the fact that they are who they are and not who other people (sometimes me, I have to confess) expect them to be. (All this despite the fact that I’d spent the last hour, yelling from downstairs, telling them to go to sleep.) Made me tell them the most honest ‘I love you’ of the day, one that came from the bottom of my heart, one that almost hurt as I said it.
Made me stop feeling an inadequate mum, with my first child because I fell in the trap of trying to meet other people’s expectations and with my second, because I didn’t give a shining shit about their expectations and decided to do it my way, or more accurately, my child’s and mine, ‘our way’.
You must’ve been told this a million times but, do you know when you first read about all those feelings that you know oh so well but that you’ve never been able to describe or put into words? Well, this is it. This is what I felt when I read your posts. In my little, crazy -or maybe not so crazy- world, you have just become the Bruce Springsteen of motherhood. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Tina
Tuesday, 22 January, 2013 at 6:07Thank you, thank you, thank you! Beautifully written. My daughter is also a little “rocket”, and often have I found myself questioning our parenting skills or asking myself why we can’t have a “normal” child. One minute she will be this brilliant, lovely, caring 6-year-old, the next minute she’ll be this whining, reliant little brat, that just drives you bat. shit. crazy.
She also finds reading and writing incredibly hard, but numbers? She looooves them, if it was up to her, maths would be the only subject in school. We are very lucky to have found a great private school for her, where she is accepted for who she is, not what she can do or how she behaves. And we are trying to let her be, and not feel bad about her weirdness, but embrace it. It’s not easy, is it, with people giving you the look and waggling their fingers under your nose…but we’ll manage. You seem to be doing a great job, by the way. I love your blog and can’t believe I have only just discovered it.
Debby
Tuesday, 29 January, 2013 at 22:16I can hardly see through the tears as I write this! THANK-You for validating my son and me as his mother! He is 13 now and we still struggle through many things, but he is truly the most loving human being I have ever met and he has taught me a world of lessons that I keep forgetting and of which I am so thankful he reminds me! He can make me laugh like no one else on this earth! The amount of work he must do on a daily basis just to focus and do what most of us find easy humbles me. Again, THANK-You.
Debby
Mari Gomez
Thursday, 31 January, 2013 at 19:33Thank you for the laugh! I could so very much relate to almost everything you have written (mine isnt in school yet). Yes, its not easy having one of “those”, and its not easy dealing with the looks of disaproval from the rest of the world, nor hearing “My God! What’s wrong with him? So and So (older siblings) wasnt like this!!” For the longest time, I didnt understand what was happening. Now I know. I love my baby through and through.
Athena Hammond
Wednesday, 6 February, 2013 at 1:17I have just visited this blog for the first time and am so heartened to see so many women trying their asses off to embrace the kookiness of their kids. I too am the proud owner of a child who was spectacularly annoying for much of his young life. He drove most people bananas with his endless insane ideas and activities (including me, as a single mum) and never stopped talking. Really, even in his sleep. Now, at 15, he is a total fucking winner. Hilarious, loving, kind, a bit mental and perfectly able to be quiet for extended periods of time. Thanks so much for reminding me how awesome “those” kids can be.
renegademama
Thursday, 7 February, 2013 at 11:20Isn’t it amazing that so many rad women have gathered here? I feel super lucky, every time I read their comments. I love that you called your boy “spectacularly annoying.” Well said, and welcome!
Athena Hammond
Thursday, 7 February, 2013 at 13:42Thank you, I’m looking forward to plundering your entire back catalogue of posts!
Stacy
Monday, 11 February, 2013 at 2:34This was great…
Question… Have you considered having your son evaluated for possible autism? I know… Scary word… My daughter is so similar to what you described. She was diagnosed with high functioning autism this past fall, and while i am not so mich into labels, u derstanding her diagnosis has really helped me manage behavior, and have more patience when the crazyness arises.
In no way am I trying to offend… Just thought i would share my experience
Stacy
Monday, 11 February, 2013 at 2:34This was great…
Question… Have you considered having your son evaluated for possible autism? I know… Scary word… My daughter is so similar to what you described. She was diagnosed with high functioning autism this past fall, and while i am not so mich into labels, u derstanding her diagnosis has really helped me manage behavior, and have more patience when the crazyness arises.
In no way am I trying to offend… Just thought i would share my experience.
Louise
Wednesday, 13 February, 2013 at 11:27absolutely gorgeous. that rocket is going to go places farther than our eyes allow us to see.
Louise recently posted..music was everything
Mallorie
Wednesday, 13 February, 2013 at 12:23I just pissed my pants reading this. I dropped off some dinners to an elderly couple last night. I was so tired from running around all day. My kid proceeded to climb all over their furniture. She looked kind of horrified but in my head I was like “fuck it. Im bringing you dinner”. She turned to me and said “we have 18 grand and great grand children,” Oh thank God was my only response.
Jesica
Wednesday, 13 February, 2013 at 18:17Oh my goodness I love this post! I too have a child like Rocket, he goes by the name of “Hurricane” most days. He is intense, loud, emotional, wild, and fiercely loving. One minute he is driving me bonkers with his intense need to argue a moot point, and the next minute he is squeezing the life out of me with a giant hug and telling me I am the most beautiful mother in the entire world. He is absolutely exhausting but exhilarating all at once!
SHellyvonb
Friday, 15 February, 2013 at 11:28This blog f*cking rocks. I do not have kids, and I am taking all of these hilarious, poignantly well written posts straight to heart. Your little rocket sounds a lot like how my current boyfriend was in his childhood- hugely empathetic, music aficionado, hyperactive, a wikipedia brain constantly ‘on’ and had a tough time in school, even though he was ‘gifted’ and struggling with the feeling of being an intruder who didn’t belong, on the cusp of being ‘found out’. He is now 40, manages a server for a huge international company and just discovered that he is on the autistic spectrum with aspergers. It can be daunting going there, but knowledge is definitely power in cases like this. Your boy sounds like an absolute treasure – and from my experience it sounds like there’s more to it than personality.
Lauren
Friday, 22 February, 2013 at 11:50Thank you for this post! I don’t have kids but it creates a new perspective for me. I see little kids all of the time and think to myself “Why doesn’t that child’s parent control them or do something about them?! They’re so OBNOXIOUS!” But this brings all of those things back into perspective. We need to love these children for the crazy, brilliant, irritating, precious little gems that they are. They don’t need to be changed or forced into a mold of “the perfect child”, they need to be accepted and loved. We have to recognize their talents and their gifts, even when they aren’t the conventional talents. Maybe he’s not reading but he’s doing wonderfully with math and music. Now, I will be less likely to glare at “annoying” kids and their parents and realize I should be taking notes. I should be enjoying life as much as the little one is, because they aren’t concerned with what I think or what anyone else thinks. We should all take notes from little kids that love to have fun.
Kendra
Sunday, 24 February, 2013 at 18:28Thank you SO much for this post!!!
I definitely have one of ‘those’ kids … And I say: ‘to hell with all those smug parents of one well-behaved child!’
Kendra recently posted..1.19.13
Angela H
Tuesday, 19 March, 2013 at 16:35Um. I LOVE this. Thank you for putting into words something I have been unable to do.