This week we’re heavy on Rocket quotes because Ava was gone half the week (in Europe). Still, not bad.
Rocket, whining and making a “puh-lease” face: “Daddy, may I have another cookie?”
Mac: “Yes, but not because you made that face and whined.”
Rocket: “Well, it worked yesterday.”
Me: “What did you learn about today at school?”
Rocket: “I learned about how a frog will puff up his belly to look bigger, so other animals won’t eat him.”
Me: “Smart frog.”
Rocket, with an eye-roll: “Mama. It’s a frog. It’s not smart. It’s trying not to die.”
Dude. He’s five. How the hell was I supposed to know he understands the difference between survival instinct and intelligence?
And….a WTF? moment brought to you courtesy of the man inhabiting my house.
Me, on Saturday morning: “Mac, we need to clean. The house is thrashed.”
Mac: “But I did dishes this week. Why do I have to clean now?”
(Just fucking shoot me.)
Rocket, to a friend, after I told her our whole family is going to see Further in San Francisco…”Yeah, but it won’t be the same without Jerry.”
Ava, after school, upon being asked how her day went by a family friend: “Well, the bad news is my technology teacher died. The good news is I have a softball game tonight.”
Death. Softball. Whatever.