What I learned this week…Winning, all around.

by Janelle Hanchett


  1. I must have been really bad last year, because Santa brought the kids guinea pigs.
  2. Yes, yes, I realize “Santa” is me, but I’d rather not take responsibility for the presence of those two animals in my house. Let’s call it a temporary bout with Multiple Personality Disorder, wherein I became a person only interested in fulfilling the dreams of youngsters. Blinded by this mission, I make stupid decisions and wonder how it happened.
  3. More on that in my next post. Was going to write the story here but realized it would take up the whole thing, which wouldn’t leave room for my flurry of irrelevant, disconnected thoughts. Which are obviously critical.
  4. I feel kind of weird right now. Maybe it’s that I’ve been changing the way I eat. And I’ve been exercising. Weird. It’s not really a New Year’s Resolution. It’s more just a “I’m tired of feeling like shit all the time and I’m ready to feel differently but I couldn’t do anything before Christmas so I’m doing it now” type thing. I think I also don’t really know what exactly to do with myself after the insanity of last semester. I was just rushing and rushing for so long and now things are a little calmer and I’m feeling a little lost. Whatever, it happens. Then it passes.
  5. On Friday I found a plastic cup in the freezer full of frozen water. In that frozen water were a variety of Legos, mostly the heads and arms of men, signaling to me that Rocket had been experimenting. I then went to the computer and wrote in the homeschool record “studied the physical properties of water.”
  6. Yeah, so that’s pretty much how homeschool is going.
  7. Another winning area of my life is home organization. My house is so fucking thrashed I’m considering moving out. Just leaving. But I can’t afford that, so instead I’ve started throwing and giving away things, pretty much at random. I feel a pang of sad, like “Oh, I like that.” Or “Oh, I may need that.” But then I remember that every item preserved is an item to be dealt with, and I chuck that shit. I also ask myself if I’m going to care when I’m 89 and dying that I didn’t keep that one candle holder that is just so cute.
  8. Doubt it. I’ll be too busy demanding morphine and pissing off my relatives.
  9. Speaking of pain, a good part of my life is now devoted to ensuring Georgia doesn’t kill herself. Last week she: 1) fell out the back door; 2.) tripped on a toy and hit the wall; and 3.) crashed into a bush for reasons still unknown. The result was three scrapes on her head.
  10. I just kind of want her to stop moving. At least not so much, and so unpredictably. And so rapidly. Just kinda mellow a little. Take it down a notch.
  11. And this, my friends, is her new perch. Yeah. I know. Not safe. But you try keeping her off of it. Shiiiit. And yes, she’s up there so often I just feed her there now.

I believe the word you’re looking for here is “winning.”

Have a great week.

12 Comments | Posted in weeks of mayhem | January 8, 2012
  • Nj housewife

    Aw! She is absolutely adorable!!

  • Not blessed mama

    My husband was all, “Don’t let the kids sit on the table- its disrespectful, it’s where we eat” and I was all “Okay, quit your job so you can spend 11 hours a day dragging the baby off the table”.

    • renegademama

      11 hours a day. Exactly. Your extensive use of “all” made me LOL.

  • Tara

    Ha ha! We tried moving the chairs, my son moved them back, we tried putting the chairs on the table, he used anything and everything else to grab hold of the chair leg to pull it off the table… CRASH! and then use the chair to continue climbing on the table and where ever else he wanted to go…

    • renegademama

      yes, at one point we had all the chairs in the living room (um, which is connected to the kitchen).

      that lasted for about 5 minutes.

  • sherilinr

    yeah, my daughter was a dedicated climber, as well as a walking head wound for about a year. thankfully, now that she’s nine, she’s rarely bruised on her face.
    our homeschooling goes like that sometimes too.

    • renegademama

      glad to hear it – been feeling extensive homeschool-slacker guilt.

  • Stephanie

    My son won’t get off the table, either. He gets up there and does a little tap dance, marches, slides everything onto the floor. Let’s just say he’s been spending a lot of time on the “Time Out” steps, too.

    • renegademama

      Oh, Stephanie. Thank god for you. Georgia also stands on the table and marches around.

      I didn’t write that on my blog, though, for fear that it might get me arrested.

  • Nessa@CasaBraaflat

    i pretty much let my kids do whatever as long as they can only be mildly maimed by it. so i think eating on the table is totally acceptable!

    • renegademama

      this made me very, very happy