To the new mom traumatized by BabyCenter: YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

by renegademama

Look, I know how it goes. You pee on that stick and you’re all “OMG I’m having a baby!?” but you can’t tell anybody because the obligatory 12 weeks, so you go to the one place you can get excited and talk safely (OR SO YOU THINK)…


You log on, create some cryptic name for yourself, find your “Birth Club” and start reading. You think you’ll find some like-minded women in the same stage of pregnancy as you and you can all commiserate and stuff.

But all you see are acronyms. Lots and lots of acronyms. What the fuck do DD, DS, BFP and FTM mean?

Who are these people? Do all mothers speak in acronyms? Why are they all using acronyms? HOW COME I’M THE ONLY ONE NOT USING ACRONYMS?

After reading a few posts and having no clue what the hell they’re saying, you sheepishly Google “BabyCenter acronyms” hoping nobody sees and praying to God there’s some sort of guidebook for this new world. I mean you’ve only been pregnant for 47 minutes and you’re already incapable of joining the mother crew?

It ain’t looking good.

Rest easy, friend. As a woman presently enjoying her 4th child’s limbs flailing against her bladder, I’m here to tell you in absolutely no uncertain terms that YOU ARE NOT ALONE and no, despite appearances, mothers are not some sort of weird gang wherein language is reduced to communication-via-acronyms, as if baby-in-womb immediately results in the inability to write words out completely.

DD is “dear daughter” and DS is “dear son” and DH is yep, you guessed it, dear husband. And yes, I’m with you. Why the hell do I have to add “dear” to the beginning of my kids’ titles? Isn’t that sort of contained in the word “son” or “daughter?” I mean it’s my SON OR DAUGHTER. Sons and daughters tend to be “dear” to their mothers. Usually. For at least a couple hours a day.

Husbands, on the other hand, are another story and I’m still confused about what sort of twisted 1950s throw-back decided all husbands have to be referred to as “dears.” Perhaps they’ve never actually had a husband, or cohabitated with another human at all.

But I digress. FTM is “first time mom,” which basically means certain non-FTMs will tell you all the things you don’t know and will never know until you’ve reached the pinnacle of motherhood (as they have). It’s also a flag to signal to the douchebag judgmental mothers “I’m new here. Please don’t attack me for my question.” (Edit: Also, FTM means “female-to-male” and, on this blog, “Fuck the Man.” Good times.)

Incidentally, we don’t all know things you don’t. In fact, some of us admit to not knowing shit and even, perhaps, knowing less with each child. Perhaps we have a little more experience with not knowing shit, but meaningful, universal parental advice? Yeah, for some of us that died a little more with each baby, along with the stamina of our pelvic floors.

I mean I’ve been a mother for nearly 13 years and all I have to offer is that I think the excessive use of acronyms should be classified as some sort of disease, particularly when it’s used to turn regular words into cute words.

The worst acronym is BFP. “Big fat positive.” Oh god help me. Just say “positive pregnancy test” and move on.

Maybe I’m just a bitter skeptic.

No, for sure I’m a bitter skeptic. And if you’re still reading, you might be one too.

So anyway you read the acronym list and you’re “in” and stuff but now that you know what people are saying, you’re actually more terrified than you were before. It turns out that access to the content of these posts is actually WAY WORSE than the ignorance you previously faced.

You read things like “Hey, FTM here. I just got my BFP and I’m wondering…is it possible to get pregnant from a blow job?”

You read it like 7 times, lest your eyes deceive you. You tell yourself you’re making it up. It’s a joke. Somebody’s joking. THIS MUST BE A JOKE.

But then the next post is titled “Am I pregnant?” and you’re like “Well hmmmm, I fear I may not be the correct person to answer such a question, particularly since I’m not a motherfucking pregnancy test.”

Who answers the question “Am I pregnant?” by logging on to an online forum? In other words, a place 100% unable to provide a reliable answer, particularly when a reliable answer is available for a few bucks at the local grocery store?

And then you start to wonder if perhaps you’ve entered some strange twilight zone in which all the people are insane, and the ones who aren’t insane post things like “Abortion is MURDER” and then wonder why they get so much “backlash for sharing their opinions.”

Wait. Maybe they’re insane too.

You read on, sure you’ll find your people. Sure you’ll find people who are just kind of regular ol’ humans who just found out they’re pregnant but instead you find people asking about baking soda and urine to determine the sex of their baby (at 5 weeks pregnant). You decide to give it a break and try another day, for the good of your own mental well-being.

A couple weeks later you wonder when you might feel your baby move. You log on and read this: “I felt my baby move at 6 weeks. It’s all a matter of how in-tune you are with your body. I do yoga so I’m sure that’s how I felt it.”

And you’re like “What the fuck is wrong with this broad? You moron your “baby” is like the size of a goddamn pea – and it has no limbs yet – but rather than own the fact that logic has clearly vacated your brain, you’ve somehow managed to turn this around to look like a deficiency on MY PART. (You know, because I’m so out of touch with my body I can’t feel the flutters of practically nothing.)

Look, FTM, all I really want to say is that you aren’t alone. BabyCenter and Pinterest and shit, they’re fun, I like them okay sometimes, but I assure you you’re not the only one who reads words like “I haven’t yet committed to a nursery theme” and feels a strange sense of existential angst. There’s nothing wrong with you because your “nursery” is an office you were supposed to deal with a year ago, or a corner in your bedroom, or a corner in your bedroom of your parents’ house. There’s nothing wrong with you because your “nursery theme” is the stuff your sister gave you, or you look at that empty bedroom and realize you have absolutely no taste. None. No decorative style/ability/decorative talent up in here. So basically you buy stuff and put it in the room and hope for the best.

There’s nothing wrong with you because you’ve gained 36 pounds at 29 weeks and the BabyCenter humans are all “I’ve gained 12 pounds and I’m 38 weeks and I just feel AWFUL!”

You’re not the only one who reads posts about “still satisfying my man even when I’m pregnant” with an eye-roll and mumble “Satisfy my man? Huh? He’s lucky he gets it once a month. I’m creating new life, piss on myself when I laugh and have a baby pressing against my cervical wall and I waddle – WHAT THE HELL DO I CARE IF MY “MAN” IS GETTING HIS ROCKS OFF?”

There’s nothing wrong with BabyCenter.  That’s not true. There’s a shit-ton wrong with BabyCenter, but of not everybody there is psycho. And it’s damn entertaining. I still go on it sometimes, for funsies, to watch the drama, to read things like “HELP ME! I can’t find a perfect GOING HOME OUTFIT!!!!” and enjoy it for what it is while being okay with the fact that my baby’s “going home outfit” is not the central focus of my day, nor will it ever be, because I just don’t care that much about things like that. Yeah, when I had hospital births it was fun, but it was never life-changing. So few of these things are ever actually life-changing: The crib, the diaper bag, the nursery theme, the carseat system thing.

For a long time I felt like a freak because the only damn thing that really mattered to me was the baby, and possibly the fact that it was in my belly and needed to exit. I didn’t get excited about cupcakes or baby sprinkles or gender reveals or cute baby announcements (have yet to send those bastards out) and I was sure I was defective somehow. I’m a subpar homemaker with rooms that don’t match and the idea of “coordinating” things makes my stomach hurt.

But truthfully the only think I’ve really learned over the past 13 years is that THE ONLY DAMN THING THAT MATTERS IS THE BABY.

It’s the only part that’s life-changing at all. The rest can be fun, but it’s superfluous, and it’s okay not to care and in fact, many of us don’t.

So yeah, you may feel like the silent lurking freak on BabyCenter, but you are not alone. There’s a shitload of us.

Just wanted to let you know.

Um, my baby's "nursery." It's next to my dresser. Inside is Georgia's doll and pillow. Tied to the leg is our dog's leash, because he chews shit at night if he's not tethered. Pin that shit, baby!

Um, my baby’s “nursery.” It’s next to my dresser. Inside is Georgia’s doll and pillow. Tied to the leg is our dog’s leash, because he chews shit at night if he’s not tethered. Pin that shit, baby!

more stuff I shouldn't have said out loud:

  • Amy

    Thank you for this! I feel sometimes that I am the only one who is wondering about all the acronyms. Of course, I also greatly dislike when people say they are preggars, or Prego(also a spaghetti sauce). I guess I’m just old fashioned. I also tell my 2 1/2 old twin girls that mommy will not be taking them on any ‘play dates’ , we are just going somewhere to play!

  • SabbaDabba

    Yes to all of this. I would amend “The only thing that matters is the baby,” to also include “You, the people you choose to parent with, and your baby are the only things that matter.” Families growing together, and each part of that puzzle continuing to “matter” in the context of this new life and shape, that’s my biggest priority. I don’t want to forget my husband or myself, or our dog for that matter. The cat, the cat will be fine.

  • Elizabeth

    Glad it’s not just me! Reading some of those posts I always felt like I had slid sideways into some kind of parallel universe. For the record, my knee-jerk interpretation of FTM was Fuck the Man, and it’s amusing to mentally insert that when reading posts.

  • LisaC

    Love. Love. Love. Love. I found some amazing friends there but there are mean spirited trolls on that site, plain and simple.

  • Gloria

    I wish you were blogging 14 years ago. I was pregnant my senior year of college and felt so isolated. I had minimal baby supplies and most of them were hand me downs. The baby (now a lovely 8th grader) turned out fine, of course – I wish I had known that at the time!

  • April

    Wow! I have never been on that website as I have 8+ years of trying to conceive under my belt but they seem snarky in that room. I will stick with my infertility groups when I finally get my BFP (which after 8 years is a BIG FAST POSITIVE).

  • Gloria

    I just remembered that my only ‘resource’ was that horrible book ‘What to Expect When You’re Expecting’…..shudder….it should be called ‘Pregnancy: You’re doing it wrong’.

  • MommaDJane

    Hilarious. My oldest will be 17 this summer and I had no idea what all the acronyms meant. Learned something new today, although my youngest and last is 7 now.

  • Emma Hawkins

    Ah so refreshing to read this.

  • Kim

    Hah! Yes. Great article! So much truth. (Also, I absolutely needed the chuckle today. I appreciate the hell out of this.)

  • Katherine


    ;) Couldn’t resist.

  • amy

    Love this. I wasn’t hip to the site during my first pregnancy but at 8 weeks along on second knocked-up-ness, I’m finding I’m a frickin moron.

  • Dani

    I LOVED Baby Centre when I was pregnant. The idealism, the smug rightness exuded from every poorly spelled, acronym-littered atrocity of a post, I could overlook it all in the face of all the new information I was suddenly and surprisingly interested in. As soon as I had an actual new human who didn’t care Jack shit for how many hours he was supposed to be sleeping at night, the appeal waned.

    I started a post this morning about the emails I still get from Baby Centre and how even though I’m now 19 months into this motherhood thing and know that it’s a all load of crap, they still make me feel like I’m doing motherhood WRONG. Now I’ll feel a bit weird if I finish it, like I’m copycatting… damn, I’m doing that wrong too!

  • amy

    I’m glad I’m not the only one who wants to punch DH in throat.

  • Jessica

    Yes!! This times a million!! I got a positive preggo test in November and logged on just for fun, and it TOTALLY freaked me out, in a span of a week I was convinced I was having an eptopic pregnancy, a miscarriage, or an alien or maybe I wasn’t even pregnant at all… I was totally stressed out. The little cells decided to stop growing at 5 weeks, so I had a reason to stop logging on, but when we found out I was pregnant again this month, I made a very strict no baby center policy and I’ve been uber relaxed!

    I’ll never forget reading these women who had names and clothing bought within an hour of their positive test and then were devastated when it was just a chemical pregnancy and they got their period a week later, I know there are real stresses that come with problems concieving, but these women were WAY to intense for me. **shudder**

    Never again!

    • Jess

      If you want a good, no stress website, is where I ran to after I realized everyone on babycenter was bat shit crazy.

  • Meredith

    Your post just made my day! Teething, congestion and finding a cockroach nest in a toy box are hardly entertaining. I needed a good belly laugh, thanks!

  • Ennel

    My brain always translates FTM to Female to Male, as in trans identity. It makes the posts far more interesting.

    • Ruth

      So did mine. I kept thinking, “WTF?” And i agree, it does make the posts far more interesting.

  • Cristina

    I love you so much for saying this. So many women post serious medical questions and I’m like uh, ask your doctor. I despise all the acronyms and deliberately don’t use them. DH my ass.

  • Tracey a.k.a. KidLit

    Ok chick, where were you when I was preggo and freakin’ out?!? Eh, oh well. I some how survived and so did the kids so… all is good.

    BTW, my kiddos “nursery” was beside my bed for all 3. First one, I bought baby decor, realized how stupid it looked in an adult room and sold it. Didn’t bother with the other 2.

  • Stephanie

    I LOLed twice. And, by the way, I felt my DTs (darling twins — HA! I always thought it was darling. No?) move immediately following conception. In fact, at that moment, a youthful cherub leaned down from heaven and whispered what I can remember only as, “You’re fucked, sister!”

  • Alison

    The acronyms annoy the shit out of me.

    Especially when it crosses over to blog posts and comments – come on people, keep it to the Babycenter forums!!

    I love this post so much.

  • tomi

    I gave up on babycenter a long time ago. You really wonder about some of those ladies. The tell me if I’m pregnant posts were always painful. Especially the ones that said ” I have three negative tests, but I just know I’m pregnant. i have xyz symptoms, could I be preggers? When do you think I am due?”

    I ended up being the jerk saying “pee on your keyboard and I will let you know”

    • Jessica S.

      Ha ha ha ha….I saw that comment, and it was hilarious!

  • Jennifer @ Also Known As...the Wife

    A hilariously accurate profile of the pregnancy message boards. People take their social “lives” on these boards much too seriously and all I want to say is “hashtag first world problems.”

  • jill (mrs chaos)

    I have never NOT ONCE called my husband Dear Husband. Because NO. I can’t handle the DD, DS and DH. Like, at all.

    And yes, I know you said other things besides that, but that’s all I can focus on because I hate it that much.

  • Kyla

    Oh my god you hit this one on the head!!! Awesome post….simply awesome. After giving birth to my second child just 4 days ago I sooooo relate to everything you say above and found my self in hysterics as I read. And yes…the only f*&ing thing that matters is the baby. People asked us right up to the day “is the nursery ready yet?” Uh…nursery? You mean the spare room that my partner slept in for 9 months because I was unbearable to sleep beside while pregnant? No, it’s not. It will have a crib and a dresser and a lamp. At some point. Maybe. ;-)

    Love your blog…I love that it is and you are real. Keep it up!!

  • Vagina

    All the reasons I love you!!! Until this very moment I had no friggin clue what those acronyms meant. I have no idea why, but it always looked kind of like porno talk to me. Like DD somehow has something to do with S&M’s or something. I don’t know!! Anyway….I have 4 kids, and a broken vagina, and I piss myself constantly and that is real life for me. That’s what I would like to read at baby center. The hardest thing for me is the constant comparing. It starts when you are pregnant, and continues after the baby is here with ” is your baby doing this or doing that”..kind of BS. I regret things with my first baby because I let people get to me and make me feel like I needed to be better. I was only 17 and everyone felt they needed to tell me how to do things. So I pushed her to walk and pushed her to not be attached and all the bullshit that everyone said I needed to do. By the time I had my 4th if anyone even tried to tell me i was doing it wrong I would tell them to fuck the fuck off!!!! I will breast feed my baby as long as I damn well want too. I will let my kid sleep in my bed as long as I damn well want too! And why the hell does anyone else care about how I choose to love and care for my child anyway. I Love you so damn much Janelle!! You are an inspiration to non pinterest moms everywhere!!! The only thing I would say here is that I do actually get excited about cupcakes. But that has nothing to do with having babies…I just really like cupcakes. Mostly because I don’t like sharing.

  • Emma

    Oh my goodness, I am actually crying with laughter. Where were you when I was pregnant? I really hope my son is not scarred by the lack of a gender reveal party, baby shower, assembled baby book (the book is a beautiful handmade gift from a friend and still as empty as the day I opened it), or theme for anything at all. I can only hope actual time spent together will help him get through therapy later on in life.

  • katrina

    you are AWESOME!!

  • cara

    oH.. I needed the laughs today Janelle.. thank you so much!

    I’m 25 weeks totally unprepared and fully checked into the high risk unit 60 miles from home. My mom is asking me about the shower and what theme I want and if she should bring all her friends to my room in the antepartum ward (yes I studied latin and know what it means.. but seriously could a pre-baby landing pad sound more vampiric if it tried?)

    I’m just cringing…uhmm.. I hope she stays in until tomorrow mom.. I really don’t care if we have a shower and please no pink. anything but pink.. lavender, yellow, neon green.. anything but pink..

    oh and did I mention the only name my DH ever repeats is Xerox so this FTM is totally out of her element because I thought that I’d get my laundry out of the someday nursery/live out step-sister/wedding present room before we finally move the old desk and printer out of the way for the crib and full pottery barn (2nd hand) bedroom set my mom bought me (under duress) at 5 weeks.. 20 weeks later.. still no nursery.. but all the lurking and ridiculous self defining of alphabet soup acronyms seems so indulgent when I’m trying to focus all of my “in touch with my body” energy on grow quick little industrialized paper eating machine named baby while conning my kidneys into healing themselves enough to keep her inside just one more day (or fingers crossed 9 weeks?).

  • Jessica

    Agree entirely. Another classic one for the glossary is AF = Aunt Flo: menstruation/period. WTF?!!

  • peggy miller

    When I was expecting my daughter, I asked my OB for a decent pregnancy manual that didn’t insult my intelligence the way “What to Expect When You’re Expecting” did. He laughed. Also, I did read some book about saving money on baby crap while I was expecting and the first thing it said was “Heads up folks: the only thing your new baby NEEDS is you. The rest is just commercials.” That gave me a lot of perspective and I’m glad I came across it when I did. It helped. Yay for cutting through the bullshit!

  • Jessica S.

    Someone posted this on my birth club on Baby Center and we love it! It’s hilarious! And so dead on. I flippin’ hate acronyms, they drive me insane and we’re adults, it is NOT hard to type crap out!

    Not to mention the women worried about take home outfits. You’re taking home a baby, isn’t that more exciting than the outfit you put it in?

    Also, one thing you forgot to mention, was the women who should really be calling their doctors when they have some scary symptoms, but who post to ask if if they should call. Then they say they’ll wait, when *GASP* everyone tells them to call their doctor!

  • IGL

    This is refreshing. That is the easiest way to say it. When my wife and I were having our first, we of course went to Baby Center, which was quasi-helpful. I think our best move was to stay out of the forums – there are literally thousands of books about babies and how to raise them in whatever way you prefer, why do we need a bunch of over-opinionated mother hens telling me we am doing it wrong because we didn’t buy a g-d wipe warmer?! Also, I am in complete agreement, I, a husband, am less than “dear”. Perhaps we should consider the “D” in those acronyms to mean “damn” because let’s be honest, we all love our families – spouses and kids alike – but more often than not, we all crave the 10-30 minutes of peace we might get once the kids are down and the spouse is absorbed in whatever activity allows them to forget that tomorrow it all starts again.

  • Sarah

    Yes to alllllll this. Thanks for giving me a great laugh this morning!

  • Brenda

    OMG, the acronyms are the worst! And just when you think you have them figured out, you decide to research a new baby topic, like cloth diapers, and have to learn a whole new set of acronyms! I refuse, I still call my husband, “husband” and my daughter, “daughter.” It’s not that hard, people!

  • Sam

    This is brilliant! So glad I’m not alone – the acronym thing is absolutely hideous and you are so right about there being ABSOLUTELY NO NEED for adding the word ‘Dear’ to everything! I think I felt a little bit of sick come in my mouth when i found out that’s what it meant! I was a silent lurker too for a while until I got too exasperated by a thread started by someone who thought it was completely normal to be trying to sleep train a 5 week old baby! Nutters!

  • MissFifi

    I remember looking up stuff when I found out I was preggers.The acronym thing was mind boggling and I had to look it all up! LOL
    I am an older mom, had the surprise sprung on me at 41 and I have to say I was surprised by how many nasty people there are in the baby world. Look, if I do not want to or can’t breast feed or if I want to circumcise MY son, I will, so piss off. Women really can be their own worst enemy.
    I feel because I was older I was a little more relaxed and not as easy to be made to fell like shit because of choices we made. The one thing I tell every new Momma is “Don’t go online too much” and “Go with your gut. What works for you and yours may not be what works for others.” I also no longer have guilt with letting our two year old hang on the iPad watching PBS Kids or some stuff on YouTube. We interact, we play, we discuss,you know, I treat him like a person not some appendage that should be worshipped in special snowflake style. (WOW, who let that crazy lady in here??) LOL Sorry for the side rant :)

    • MeiLe

      I’m only in my 20’s, but was raised by grandparents and am old-fashioned. Being young and pregnant, and old-fashioned, definitely led to hard times on Baby Center. When I got PPD and tried to reach out for advice or stories from others who might have had PPD, all I got were comments that I was lying and didn’t really have it or was just trying to get pity points. Or letting my son sleep on his stomach made me a bad mom who shouldn’t be allowed to raise kids because I’m gonna make him die of SIDS. Heaven forbid I let him have a pillow because it helps him sleep better, or a blanket because he gets overheated easily and I wanted him to be able to kick it off.

      Well… almost 6 months later… he’s alive and well, and couldn’t be happier. Now they say I’m lying that he has teeth or is sitting and trying to stand. Definitely agree with you about not going online too much. BabyCenter + Postpartum Depression = crying your eyes our and wanting to starve for days on end, plus feelings of minor hatred towards your family. Definitely not how I wanted to feel after having a baby!

  • Jennifer

    The thing that always drove me insane is when people would start to talk about the “birth experience.” The only experience I had was being miserable, and the only thing I cared about was ending up with a healthy baby. I didn’t really care how it got here as long as it got out.

  • Missy

    Babies make us all dumb and crazy. It’s all their fault. The end.

  • Sam

    I found your blog on babycenter, my board has been pretty dramatic. They’re crazy!

    I have to tie my dog to the bed too. She is also crazy and eats diapers from the garbage at night.

  • Diana

    Just about the only piece of advice I give to friends who are parents-to-be is to stay the hell away from those painfully ridiculous message boards.

    When I was pregnant, my mom sent me the Dr. Spock parenting book she bought in the 70s while they were stationed overseas (see also: no Skype and no money for long distance calls). It was her only parenting advice. Still not as bad as some of the crazy that throws itself up all over Baby Center.

  • Sarah H

    I have been a BabyCenter member for almost 7 years. I am also a member of a Facebook group that is a BabyCenter spin off and I would count those women among some of my closest friends. When my oldest son passed away suddenly last year, I found an incredible outpouring of love and support from hundreds of people that I will probably never meet in real life. These same anonymous people released balloons all across the country for my son on what would have been his sixth birthday. BabyCenter is certainly not all bad.

  • Laurie McFarland

    Ha! I love this and I love you. I was a major underachiever with all the baby crap with my first born, and it all went downhill from there. My fourth kid was lucky if I remembered to pack a diaper when we went out. I love my babies, just not all the paraphenalia. (And if I’ve mispelled anything here, it’s because I don’t know how to spell anymore thanks to autocorrect. I’m typing this on a PC.)

  • Emily

    Almost every time is read your blog I’m convinced that you’re either my best friend or my idol. Thank you for writing.

  • Temptress Mama

    I didn’t even know I was supposed to make cute baby announcements until I found that space in the baby book. I wrote “we announced it on Facebook in a status update and called people” in that section. It was also after my step brother had his kid six months later announced with one of those cutesy photos that I started to wonder if I did something “wrong”. Then I remembered I didn’t care! As for the going home outfit, I hadn’t put too much thought into it because my original plan was to deliver at home. I got talked into going to the hospital by one of the midwives who thankfully didn’t deliver my son. Next kid’s at home so I won’t be caring about a going home outfit then either. And don’t get me started on gender reveals and baby sprinkles. Not doing either with our next kid. Not even sure I want to have a big party for my son’s first birthday because there are too many people, many of whom I only sort of tolerate, and it’s too much work for something he’ll probably sleep through.

  • Dana

    Oh yeah, I remember googling all those abbreviated things too. Ad yes I remember reading the most ridiculous posts on the forum which was one of the main a sons I le the forum.

  • Becky

    I’m not even a mom yet, and a few years ago used message boards on The Nest to deal with some issues, and glanced at The Bump, also saw a ton of acronyms I didn’t understand – and didn’t want to understand. Thank you so much for more assurance that I am not a total weirdo for not wanting to me in the know. I should get on one of those baby boards and use ATBBC – Ahhhh These Bitches Be Crazy. I made that one up by myself.

  • becky

    OMG I hate bloomin acronyms too! ;-)

  • StaCee

    DH my ass.. after 17 years of marriage the man is lucky to be alive.. and the only time I call him dear is in the sarcastic, you’re in deep fucking shit, “yes Dear” manner.. lol

    • StaCee

      P.S. I always find it entertaining to replace the dear in dh, ds, dd with something different each time.. douchey, ditzy, dumbass, it’s hours of fun for the whole family..

  • Haley

    BBCs very own Debate Team has decided to use this post as a topic of debate. You’re famous. ;)

  • Kelli S

    So GREAT!!! The BEST thing about my daughter’s “going home” outfit was that two months later, my husband, having placed less than no importance on it in the first place, stuffed her in it and she looked like a big pink tick! It was like on the movie “A Christmas Story” when the kid is crying in his snowsuit because he can’t put his arms down. I laughed so hard, I peed my pants, (although I was already used to that by then) not just because she looked so funny, but because he had no idea the outfit had any significance, nor that it was too small, nor that there was anything wrong with it once on her! Babycenter had its moments- like the weekly (I think) e-mail telling you which fruit or veggie closely represented the size of the baby inside. We called her a kumquat for a long time! But don’t get sucked into the discussions, or the milestones. People raise kids in mud huts. I’m sure my hand-me-down nursery theme will be just fine.

  • sue

    I feel like I wrote this myself and had just forgotten about it.

  • Mandy

    Thank you for this. Someone needs to make those acronyms STOP! They are beyond obnoxious, & I find it hard to believe that pregnant hormones have not yet caused someone to go apesh*t on one of the forums. DD? Really… You’re one letter away from an actual word!
    Can’t we unite as pregnant women and vote these things off?



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  • Rose

    Yeah I read some of those threads one in which a mum said she did not want the fetal monitor. Who was told by one poster that if she refused it the hospital could get a court order and forced her and she’s find herself tied to the bed “for her own good.”
    Then there was this other thread here

    Where these mums were telling another poor mamma having a C section that she’d have her arms straped to the OR table. They don’t do that now, at least not here in New York hospitals and I have a C Section 2 years ago And I certainly was not strapped down. I think some of those posters just say things to wind each other up. They shouldn’t be allowed to post such misinformation. If some poor expectant mamma reads that it could sends her into a panic I don’t understand why the mods on that forum allow such posts.

  • Babycentersucks

    I had the most horrid experience at BabyCenter. It’s filled to the brim with extremely rude and immature individuals that enjoy offending and ridiculing others. Yet, if you actually call someone out on being rude, your comment gets deleted. I’ve seen way too many people pretty much run away screaming from there … and so did I, pretty much. I’m just now waiting for my account to be deleted. Nevermore. Blargh.

  • lizzie1hoops

    I know this post is a year old…I’m 6 weeks pregnant and seriously scared of BabyCenter. Test tweaking anyone?? That’s a thing where a pregnancy test is inconclusive (read:negative) but women get others to mess with photos of the test to see if they can make it appear different? Help!

  • s rush

    Yes, Id say about 99% of anything related to pregnancy and infertility Ive found online is just sad. Sad because it says how manipulative the industry of it is, and how well that manipulation is working! The online culture of pregnancy and infertility is ignorant, cruel, pathetic, desperate. It got me here to this website because I googled “who hates pregnancy acronyms”. I wish I never had to google anything else about it! Ill try not to!

  • Janine


    Im a FIRST TIME MUM who joined babycentre when I was still taking things in and boy have I noticed the stuff people keep posting. Something I keep seeing is everyone is STILL taking pregnancy tests even after they have got their positive. Why??? I kid you not one women was complaining that 3 out of her 25 pregancy tests were negative. Im glad im on the only one :)

  • Little Tex

    Thank you! I was wondering if people who reproduce are all drooling idiots. Now what is that saying about us? Or does having a BFP (big fat positive) mean your brain starts to deteriorate to the point where you can only speak in acronyms and start to wish “baby dust!” on others? If anyone has a suggestion on communities I can visit with some intelligent life, I would certainly appreciate suggestions.

  • Trackbacks

  • Trackback from And it was all yellow… | And then the fun began...
    Monday, 3 March, 2014

    […] and did a bit of forum lurking. Not only did I notice the plethora of unneccessary acronyms (see this recent post by one of my favourite radical parenting bloggers Renegade Mothering) but that quite a lot of […]

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