This week…I [almost] moved the potty out of the living room.

by Janelle Hanchett
  1. There comes a time every semester when I realize I really should just pull the plug on the whole endeavor, because I’m going to die from the stress. And what use is a Master’s Degree if you’re dead?
  2. These are the things I want to know.
  3. In fact, I don’t quit precisely because I want to know if an M.A. is any use in hell, where I will surely be going after I die from stress, OR kill the next 21-year-old who sends me an email asking THE VERY FUCKING THING we discussed in class, at least 4 times.
  4. Anyway, I’m there: the midpoint, when the projects are deep and the money is short, and the end seems nowhere in sight. Okay. Enough whining. I’ve done school before. I’ll do it again. WE SHALL NOT FAIL.
  5. On another equally riveting topic, I believe I have mentioned that we have a toddler potty in our living room. Luckily, our house is not exactly what one would call “fancy,” so a plastic toilet in the corner really doesn’t seem particularly out of place. Now that I say that out loud, I’m realizing that’s really, really weird.
  6. But true, nonetheless.
  7. What can I say? Georgie enjoys pooping among her people. After she did that particular act this morning, and we jumped up and down and gave her high-fives for rockin’ the potty training thing, I picked up the center part of the potty (um, with the poo in it), to dump it in the actual toilet. As I was walking to the bathroom, Georgie decided to throw some large toy object in front of me, causing me to trip forward and launch the contents of the toddler toilet across the kitchen floor.
  8. I believe I now understand why people do not keep toddler toilets in the living room. Ask me where the toddler toilet is now. Yeah, that’s right. Still in the living room. WHAT?
  9. [Why do you look surprised? I mean if I had the capacity to LEARN from my mistakes, why would I have THREE children instead of ONE? I don’t mean that. That was a joke.]
  10.  You know what isn’t a joke? Last night at 5:30 our friend’s dog ran away from our house. We looked for him until 1 in the morning and haven’t found him yet. My heart is just breaking. These particular people are CRAZY in love with this little pup. And so, Rusty Bear, if you’re reading this, I hope you had fun gallivanting around town, but it’s time to come the fuck home, little fella, before your owners lose their shit for good.
  11. Oh, right, forgot to mention, Mac and Rocket had their first guitar recital together yesterday. They both take guitar lessons from the same (amazing) teacher. Mac and this other little boy played guitar and Rocket sang and banged these stick things together (um, percussion?). The song was “When the saints go marching in.”

Not gonna lie, I cried a little. I mean you don’t see THIS and keep it together.

Well at least, I don’t…

Have a great week, all.


10 Comments | Posted in weeks of mayhem | October 21, 2012
  • luella

    i also have a potty chair in my living room. I was literally JUST wondering when i should move it into the bathroom, to avoid the stinky chambermaid walk across the entire house.

  • Wendy

    I hear you. We go to the same school, I believe, from reading your blog in the past. I have one semester left after this and after 3.5 years of trudging toward my MS, I could literally throw the towel in, were in not for the fact that the end is actually in sight. Working three internships, three classes, and two kids under 6 = a huge gas bill, a huge alcohol bill, and a huge amount of stress. We will prevail. Right/

  • Wendy

    That was supposed to be a question mark. Like, right?!?

  • The Gym B***h

    Ummmmm, we don’t have one in the living room because of the day the twins wandered (rampaged?) through the neighbor’s house, saw their port-a-potty, lifted it up, tipped it over (including the contents) and kept right on going . . .

    Great news for Georgie!!! Send her over to teach Gavin . . . Lucas, thanks to his constipation issues, poops on the toilet. XOXOXOXOX

  • Ken

    Born and raised on a cattle rranch in the Mojave Desert. Half Moon crapper out back but a Grandpa modyfied rocking horse potty in the living room until age 2 or 3. As a matter of fact the horse potty went where ever I went, PERIOD! My Grandma told poop on the floor stories about the Living Room, Bedroom. Kitchen, Dining Room, the old DeSoto, et al. My parents, however, weren’t having any part of no stinking potty horse, potty chair or any other potty thing that wasn’t in the bathroom.

    I always liked my grandparents house better.

  • Amber

    I’m cracking up at the potty in the corner of the living room! We have 3 dogs and every entrance to the main area of the house is baby-gated to keep the dogs coralled. If we didn’t have a potty seat in the living room, poor baby boy would be standing in front of the baby gate, hopping up and down and holding his boy parts.. yelling at me to come and open the baby gate so he can pee already. 🙂 It’s fine most of the time, but when we have company it can get a little uncomfortable for them if he has to poop!

  • Shan

    You can dooo eeet!

    Seriously? Where’s the video clip? Looks like the jam session was awesome.

  • Kelly

    Your kids and family are so beautiful, it makes me get all teary-eyed. Sigh… My hubby was learning to play guitar when our first little guy was born. Buuut, when #2 came along (the kid, not the poop – but maybe the poop played a part in it too, who knows), the guitar lessons stopped with a screeching halt. But now that you tell us Mac and Rocket take lessons TOGETHER, I think I’m going to have to encourage my dear hubby to wait and take lessons together with Boy #1, once his fingers can do something more complex than pick his nose. What a brilliant, and sweet idea! Then, maybe I’ll have a photo someday of them jamming together, and I’ll be all weepy over that too. Thanks 🙂

  • Julia

    i hope you find Rusty Bear soon! It’s a little worrisome when our dogs wander off. Hopefully he’ll go somewhere familiar or a shelter has picked him up and he’s safe. keep us posted!

  • Rebekah C

    Oh yes. We spent years with a potty chair in our living room. I’m so very glad that is over with. I think all moms have a potty-chair disaster story or ten.

    I hope your friends find their puppy. That is so heartbreaking. 🙁

    Rocket could not possibly be any sweeter. What a darling!